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Reflections on a German Wedding

2009 August 3
by Laura

So while waiting for this baby, we had the opportunity to go to a wedding of some friends from church on Saturday.  We really didn’t know what to expect, but I suppose, we expected it to be similar to what we experience in America.  While many parts were similar, there were some differences I thought I’d share.

  1. The Bride and Groom actually have the state wedding (legal in the eyes of the state) before the church wedding.  It can happen the morning before or the day before or weeks before.  There needs to be a witness with the Bride and Groom when the ceremony is performed, but no one else really attends this ceremony.
  2. There are no bridesmaids or groomsmen – no maid of honor or best man.  The father does not give the bride away.  There is no procession other than the Bride and Groom process up the isle together.  No flower girls, no ring bearer, etc.
  3. After the procession, the Bride and Groom take a seat in two chairs at the very front of the church facing away from the congregation.  Then commences the worship service.
  4. The worship service was the most fascinating part.  There was a full worship band and we sang 5 songs.  There was a 20 minute sermon and many prayers.  It was much like a normal Sunday service.  I thought it was great how they worshiped God before everything else.
  5. After the worship service, the Bride and Groom go to the front of the church, the pastor does the typical “Do you….” and they say “Yes, with God’s help”.  The rings are brought forth and that’s about it.
  6. After the church wedding, there are refreshments and champagne for all those in attendance and a line is formed to greet the new couple.
  7. If you are invited to the reception afterwards, you proceed there a few hours later.  While we weren’t invited to the reception, we’ve heard many interesting things about the differences.  The main one is that there is a full program.  When people RSVP, they put on the card if they’ll be performing a skit or singing a song or leading a game of some sort.  The program can last for hours and is arranged by a friend of the Bride and Groom.  After the program, there is typically dancing.  So it’s normal for the reception to last 8 or 9 hours.

Anyway, it was interesting and we highly enjoyed our first German wedding.  I think the real excitement happens during the reception and we hope, someday, we can be a part of that action too.

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2 Responses
  1. 2009 September 29
    Katherine permalink

    Interesting! I like the worship part myself and how everyone prays for you. Sounds like it is LESS commercialized.

    Just for comparison, I recently went to two engagements, one Armenian and the other Chaldean. What an experience. Of course with the language barrier I didn’t know alot hat was going on but both are elaborate, more like a wedding to me. They sure DRESS UP!!

  2. 2009 August 3
    RubeRad permalink

    1. Funny, that’s exactly what we did, except our civil wedding at the “Town Registrar” preceded the church wedding by about 15 months (and one kid).

    7. I’ve been told that European wedding receptions are usually much smaller, close family- and friend-oriented (unlike the U.S., where a wedding invite automatically equals a reception invite). I think the European way is much better — it takes everybody’s focus off of “stuff” (we buy them a present, they buy us dinner) and puts it on the wedding itself.

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